The ease with which

I spent the greater portion of tonight and this morning partying with my family.  I'm not talking about my immediate family, although my sister Sharon was present, rather my first and second cousins and some of their spouses and some of their older kids, my aunt and great aunt.  By no means a complete representation of the entire clan, but a good showing none-the-less.  

If I've never mentioned it here before let me do so now, I come from an amazing family!  There is so much that I can say and many instances that I can cite that will help you see my family from my perspective but I don't think that I'd would do the family any justice by trying to paint that picture.  What I will say is that I love and appreciate the ease with which the heart felt "I love you" roll off the tongue in my family.  Invariably the "I love you" is accompanied by a hug the likes of which would put a bear to shame.  And I'm not talking about just talking about from an aunt or older female cousin.  I'm talking about from the young people.  From the men.  From the  uncles.  The capacity for love in my family is a blessing.  

We are a big family.  A big family that is scattered to the four corners of the globe (yes I know a globe doesn't have corners, duh!) but a family bound by strong matrilineal ties.  While we may not have the wealth of a Rockefeller we have been blessed with these incredible familial ties that bind. They bridge space and time and keep us whole; makes us strong.  That hug and that "I love you" said right in your ear so that you can never not know what was said and meant is the physical manifestation of those ties that gets repeated over and over again in my family.  There is something so comforting in knowing that there is this group of people, your people, who love you just because you are you.  They don't want anything from you, they just love you because you exist and are part of them.  

I may not see many of my relative as often as I would like but when I do hearing those words, saying those words, feeling those words makes me feel safe and lets me know that I always have a place to come home to, lets me know that those ties still bind us forever.  

I take comfort in knowing that the greatest gift my family has ever given me is knowing that I am loved.  

- Wil

Update

Thank you for your prayers, well wishes and God's will be dones.  My sister has reported back to me that the biopsy of the tissue removed from her leg is benign.  Not cancerous!  Thank you, thank you and thank God.  

Much Love and Peace.  - Wil

Mildred and Henry

This is a post that I originally had on my myspace blog I'm entering it here because I liked it so much.  Also because there are a lot of Wil's Mildreds and Henrys out there and this post explains where it comes from.  

As a very visual person I tend to remember faces of people rather than their names.  Don't get me wrong for the time that I'm around that person I'm saying their name every chance I get in an effort to remember it during the party, the business meeting, the night out, etc.  A month or two later, however, I'm really hard pressed to recall the person's name.  But five, ten years later and I'll still remember their face and the feeling that the person evoked in me at that time.  

It can be awkward asking someone their name after they've clearly remembered yours.  Enter Mildred and Henry.  When I see a woman (or man) whose name I clearly forgot, none of this awkward business of "Hi, I forgot your name" with me.  I walk right up to her with a big smile on my face, happy to see her and remembering the good time that we had when we first met, give her a hug and say "Hey Mildred how are you?  It's really good seeing you again.", simply acting as if Mildred really and truly is her name.  Without fail she will say "Mildred?  Mildred?  My name is _______!"   I then tell her that I know it's not Mildred but I just forgot her name.  We both then get a good laugh out of it avoiding any hard feelings or awkwardness and I get to know her name again.  It works every time.  For the guys I use the name Henry to the same end.  

I'm often asked why Mildred.  Some think that the name is ugly.  I don't.  There's an old world quality and strength to the name Mildred that I like.  I've come to like this name so much so that I've taken to using it as a name of endearment with my female friends.  So at odd times I might say to one or another of them "Hey what's going on Mildred?" or "Mildred, did you..." or "Mildred, what are you doing for lunch?"  The looks that I initially received when I started calling them Mildred could have killed.  They've since come to accept the Mildred moniker as the term of endearment that it was intended.  

Corny I know, but that's just me.  

Jenoy.  - Wil

Two weeks three days

June is finally here!  I thought for some reason it would never come.  It seemed like it wouldn't way back in February when I locked in my decision to go to China.  Then it seemed like it was forever and ago away.  With the departure right around the corner and I feel completely unprepared to go.  What to bring? Leave? What to get?  First aid. Deet. Travel light, more clothing.  Can I buy there?  No, sizes too small in China.  You are a giant.  Ugh.  Decisions.  

I feel guilty about going as well.  You see there is so much going on right now in my family.  My father's glaucoma has gotten so bad that now the doctor want to schedule surgery to relieve the pressure in his eyes.  She wants to schedule the surgery now, within the month.  The surgery won't bring back any of the vision lost, it will only, hopefully prevent further sight loss.  Then there's no guarantee that he still won't lose his vision particularly in the left eye which is almost 75% blind already.  Geez.   

Furthermore, the surgery that my sister had yesterday to remove the lump on her leg near the knee looked cancerous to the doctor.  We'll find out by the end of the week if it is or not.  What if it is?  What's next?  Chemo?  Radiation?  Amputation?  

Seriously, how can I leave the country now?  

But I will leave.  I'll leave and I'll pray God's will be done.  I'll let his plan play out in their lives and in the lives of the rest of my family members just his plan is playing out in mine.   I'll step out on that message of faith that was given to my sister in law for me and leave it there in God's hands.  

With two weeks three days left in NYC I'll be operating at warp speed before I leave.  Tons of things to do, errands to run, family and friends to see.  Before I go, however, if you could just say a prayer for my sister and dad you'd be doing me a huge solid (favor) and I'd be extremely grateful. It can be as simple as you like or if you don't know what to say simply say: God's will be done.  That's what I'm gonna say.  Well that and a little bit more.     

I believe in the power of prayer. Of words spoken silently or aloud.  To God, Jesus, the Universe or just in general asking for an intercession.  Asking for something.  I believe in that power.  Kate Bush  says "and just saying it can even make it happen" in one of her songs.   Words have power!

Thanks.  God's will be done.  

- Wil